i always try to get an answer

why are all the men in my life such..women???

i can hardly take it anymore. just when i get settled into a nice, emotionless relationship, it's bam.. the feelings talk. what? why? must we? it was so nice, so eventless, so perfect. and then you go and pull that card on me. and i don't think that i have one guy in my life that can prove this theory of marissa's wrong: that because i am such a demanding girl, i need a boy who just gives it up. and by it i mean the pants. well. you can have the pants if i can have the card. burn it and throw it in the ocean, let it float out to the channel islands and see what they have to say. fertilize the plants for the little piggies to eat. yeah. take that emotions. and declined calls. and all that jazz. you think that people can't tell when you decline calls? well, as i learned recently, you totally can, which is sad for the person whose calls i have been declining. one ring. two rings. and voicemail. hey, it's CHANDLER. leave a message. grrr.

freaking womanly men. of course i blaim this all on my father. i actively seek men who are emotional just like him because that's what girls do. look for guys like daddy. which is kinda gross, actually. my father is great and all, but do i want to marry my father? ew. but this is an interesting view. because lately i've been doing the weirdest thing. like i see this guy riding a motorcycle and think, now that is hot. i can't even see his face but you better believe that beast under the helmet is very attractive in my mind. or i see some misfit and am like, oh i'll fix you. come to me. or i see some baby and think, oh you must be all emotional. baaaad.

marissa thinks that hooking up with seventeen year old is excuseable. gross. he's one of her "campers". she is asking me for a legit reason for her not to hook up with him. i think the fact that he is seventeen and she is TWENTY is good enough for me.

marissa, he is a junior in high school. nuff said.

back to boys being pussies. i hate you all. i'm going to bat for the other team. show up with a girlfriend at some family function. take that. wait. that would be marissa's tactic- "i'll just take *enter bi girl's name here* to where *enter former boy toy's name here* is and start making out with her in front of him. that'll show him". we really gotta stop having that rachel and marissa time. it's really just making me all... marissa like. pretty soon i'll be hot for grad students.

wait. i already like that idea. damn.

anyway. today i realized that the longer i live in this shithole of a unincorporated area, the more i actually like it. like biking down the parts of iv that aren't on the general campus expressway during the day is kinda cool. it's just so, i don't know, nice. this will be the only time in my life that i will enjoy and fit in in an environment like this. this town has worn me down. who would have thunk. hahaha. thunk.

cleaning and bedtime.

boys, grow up.