to the night, another need
so the deal is, i am procrastinating. and this will be the last time i have time to do so, so i am going to do all my favorite procrastinational deeds.
which includes checking the email, posting multiple times a day, and catching up on all the juiciest hookup details i may have missed while i was overcome by Raquila and FatNakedMan at the nudie beach (thankfully my breasteses are used to being exposed to sun and creepy old men for long periods of time at the river).
begin with: MissUnhappy is an unhappy slut. insight into her mind: didn't really want to hook up with Marine but did so anyway because it was easy and hey, he was a marine.
wha? it's not like he was hot. he had a beer belly! if you want to sleep with a beer belly boy, there are plenty around here who probably have more bedroom skills and are arguably cleaner (he was from Stockton). at least you could get a fuck buddy out of it. minimize the partners! ok, so he fixed our cabinet. that doesn't mean you owe him your vagina.
besides, drunken horny marines are kinda scary. nuf said.
the skin on my hands looks like it's fifty years old. is that normal? the rest of my body is so smooth, like a gay man's bottom.
my glasses are dirty and my computer is lagging. where are my parents (i can here them now- "if you had gone to Davis...").
third decade of life coming up, not too happy about that. less happy about Singles Awareness Day, which is even closer.
once again avoided the superbowl and all that it entails. not a single drop of alcohol has been consumed since i woke up this morning. and much biology has been read (learned? don't push it).
i can't think of anything else to say but that i really want to go paint and i don't have the time! frustrating.
MissPerfect is being especially annoying lately. she must not understand that 1. i have a bubble four miles wide and 2. any sort of chore-doing must be accomplished before buildup of bacteria and other protozians in order to avoid other 6718 residents being to search her down and bitchily proclaim that her chore must be done. but of course she will never come to this conclusion because she is "the most considerate" person in the house and knows "how to live with other people". of course she does. i should retaliate by telling all the people with newly found dents in their bumpers that it was so said roommate that had put them there. i wonder if she knows that i have seen her clumsily back into so many of our neighbor's cars. hmmm.
good thing i don't like to start drama that much. but next time that bathroom doesn't pass the white-glove test, she better make her self scarce. grr.
i need a boy. a real one. not a creepy one that shows up at our house and is drunk and touchy (ahem, Creepy C). i should start by being more accepting of imperfections. i also need some new music. i'm bored of mine. and some new facewash.
i wonder if i would need a boy as badly if Singles Awareness Day wasn't around the corner.
so i think i have effectively exhausted all of my ramblings.
which includes checking the email, posting multiple times a day, and catching up on all the juiciest hookup details i may have missed while i was overcome by Raquila and FatNakedMan at the nudie beach (thankfully my breasteses are used to being exposed to sun and creepy old men for long periods of time at the river).
begin with: MissUnhappy is an unhappy slut. insight into her mind: didn't really want to hook up with Marine but did so anyway because it was easy and hey, he was a marine.
wha? it's not like he was hot. he had a beer belly! if you want to sleep with a beer belly boy, there are plenty around here who probably have more bedroom skills and are arguably cleaner (he was from Stockton). at least you could get a fuck buddy out of it. minimize the partners! ok, so he fixed our cabinet. that doesn't mean you owe him your vagina.
besides, drunken horny marines are kinda scary. nuf said.
the skin on my hands looks like it's fifty years old. is that normal? the rest of my body is so smooth, like a gay man's bottom.
my glasses are dirty and my computer is lagging. where are my parents (i can here them now- "if you had gone to Davis...").
third decade of life coming up, not too happy about that. less happy about Singles Awareness Day, which is even closer.
once again avoided the superbowl and all that it entails. not a single drop of alcohol has been consumed since i woke up this morning. and much biology has been read (learned? don't push it).
i can't think of anything else to say but that i really want to go paint and i don't have the time! frustrating.
MissPerfect is being especially annoying lately. she must not understand that 1. i have a bubble four miles wide and 2. any sort of chore-doing must be accomplished before buildup of bacteria and other protozians in order to avoid other 6718 residents being to search her down and bitchily proclaim that her chore must be done. but of course she will never come to this conclusion because she is "the most considerate" person in the house and knows "how to live with other people". of course she does. i should retaliate by telling all the people with newly found dents in their bumpers that it was so said roommate that had put them there. i wonder if she knows that i have seen her clumsily back into so many of our neighbor's cars. hmmm.
good thing i don't like to start drama that much. but next time that bathroom doesn't pass the white-glove test, she better make her self scarce. grr.
i need a boy. a real one. not a creepy one that shows up at our house and is drunk and touchy (ahem, Creepy C). i should start by being more accepting of imperfections. i also need some new music. i'm bored of mine. and some new facewash.
i wonder if i would need a boy as badly if Singles Awareness Day wasn't around the corner.
so i think i have effectively exhausted all of my ramblings.
posted by The Smart Pineapple at 23:27
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home